The Duggars: 20 and Counting / Do Hard Things

Getting back to my book reviews. I finished up two this week.

First, Crystal and I read The Duggars: 20 and Counting, authored by Jim-Bob & Michelle Duggar (whom you've probably seen on TV). Since they have 18 children we hoped to glean some tips and tricks for managing a large family. While the book contained plenty of this sort of advice in the end that wasn't what drew my attention. The underlying theme of the book (and the Duggar family) is trusting God to direct every decision you make. The Duggars go into detail about their past and the decisions which they made both with and apart from God's guidance - and the results that followed. It is evident that God has richly blessed their family both financially and fertily (is that a word?) for seeking his will. Even if you don't have a bunch of kids this book is well worth the read simply to see God at work in their lives.

Second, I read Do Hard Things by Alex & Brett Harris. This book is written by teenagers for teenagers, but it speaks a number of truths that I found quite relevant as an adult. The Harris twins challenge teens to step beyond the world's low expectations of them and truly do something extraordinary. Scattered thoughout the book are dozens of examples of teens who put down the game controller and TV remote and made something of their life - prior to turning 21. Even for me at age 28 this book served as a real challenge to move beyond what is expected and tackle what is truly challenging. Beyond the message of the book I appreciated that the authors included a chapter on practical steps of acting on what you learned (again with examples). So many books will try to sell an idea but in the end leave the reader with no direction for how to achieve that idea. I wish I would have read Do Hard Things as a teen - I'm suspect the challenge within may have motivated me to waste far less time during that period of my life. This is going to be mandatory reading for my kids once they're a bit older.

2009 Christian Family Conference

We recently returned from the 2009 Christian Family Conference in Denver, sponsored by Christian Home Educators of Colorado (CHEC). The conference served as encouragement a chance for Crystal and I to re-focus on our commitment to develop in our children a passion to follow Jesus in every aspect of their life. As a parent, I can not see any other goal that is more critical to us at this stage in life.

To be honest, I'm finding it to be a big challenge. I realize the only way we can instill those values in our children is if they first see them modeled in us...and that just isn't as easy as it sounds. I recently had to face up to this firsthand when Crystal brought to my attention that I was allowing addiction to my computer to frequently usurp my quality time with her and the kids. I was resistant to give it up, but agreed to leave my computer at work over the weekend and instead focus on my task as a dad and husband. In hindsight, I'm really glad I did - but believe me it wasn't easy at the time.

The conference trip also doubled as our anniversary getaway. Mom and Kate kept the kids, except for Emery who wen't with Grandpa "Wiggy" to California to work on airplanes (both their favorite!). It was nice to have some quality time to spend together without the kids....we don't get it very often. Our friends Brian & Jenny Jarrett were able to escape for four days too, and we had an enjoyable time discussing what we were learning at the conference over meals with them. Brian will be blogging about some of his observations on their family blog if you're interested in taking a look.

I'm hoping to do some more blogging here myself over the course of the next few months. Things have been far to bare around here for a while.

How Not to Raise a Pagan

How Not to Raise a Pagan by Albert Mohler. Take a listen!

You believe what?!? (part 2)

So, if you've read the Introductory Post you have seen the two "wisdom tidbits" (as I called them) that God has revealed to us. Let me stop for a moment to explain that though I call them widsom tidbits, any wisdom found in them is certainly not from our own thinking, but from Gods. I have searched the recesses of my mind and found them to be utterly devoid of wisdom apart from that which I have obtained from God :)

Now, previously I posted about the first of these two tidbits. You can find that post here. In this post I want to talk about the second one: Dads and Moms have a God-given responsibility to disciple their children. Let's start by looking at what God has to say. Just prior to the Israelites entering the Promise Land, they assemble before Moses. He reads them the 10 commandments, and then tells them this:

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. - Deuteronomy 6:6-7 (NIV)

Much later, Paul reiterates this point in his letter to the Ephesians:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother"—which is the first commandment with a promise— "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. - Ephesians 6:1-4

Proverbs is perhaps the key piece of evidence for this point. Not only does it mention repeatedly that parents are to discipline and instruct their children, but the majority of the book of Proverbs was written from Solomon to his son for the purpose of discipling him and instructing him in the Lord.

As parents, we are given a huge responsibility! One we can't afford to take lightly. This is one of the key reasons why we have chosen to homeschool. By doing so we have the opportunity to spend most every day - each teachable moment - with our children...not merely educating them in reading, writing, and arithmetic, but training them to walk as Jesus walked. As parents, there is nothing more critical then training your children to be like Jesus: not your job, not your ministry, not your financial status.

Take a look at the story of Samuel as a boy if you need evidence of this. Eli the priest had failed to properly disciple his sons as children, and they grew into adults who, though they were priests (by lineage), failed to honor God. Because Eli was still unwilling to step up, correct them, and lead them by example, God brings judgement upon his household:

Then the Lord said to Samuel, “I am about to do a shocking thing in Israel. I am going to carry out all my threats against Eli and his family, from beginning to end. I have warned him that judgment is coming upon his family forever, because his sons are blaspheming God and he hasn’t disciplined them. So I have vowed that the sins of Eli and his sons will never be forgiven by sacrifices or offerings.” 1 Samuel 3:11-14 (NLT)

A chapter later Eli and his sons die. Now, I'm not saying that God will deal with us as harshly. Eli and his sons were priests and were supposed to lead the nation of Israel in service and devotion to God. The punishment for our sins has already been paid by Christ's death on the cross. However, God does not take it lightly when we ignore this responsibility.

Let me take this a step further: Can we fulfill our responsibility to train our children as disciples of Christ when they are spending the majority of their time in a government school that not only fails to teach them about God but in many cases teaches principles that are opposed to God's Word? I won't go so far as to say the answer is no (as I know a few families who have taught true discipleship to their children despite their schooling) but I do think the answer is Not Easily. I'm not pushing for legalism here...there is no verse in scripture that says "Thou shalt not send thy children to public school.", but I do think it is a subject that every Christian parent should evaluate carefully. If you reasons for sending your children to be educated by the government are selfish, due to finances, feelings of inadequacy, or the inability to get along with your children then it is likely that you are missing God's best, both for you as a parent and your children.